Futurama


Oh no! The professor will hit me! But if Zoidberg ‘fixes’ it… then perhaps gifts!

Ven ve voke up, ve had zese wodies. What’s with you kids? Every other day it’s food, food, food. Alright, I’ll get you some stupid food. Noooooo! I never loved you.

Man, I’m sore all over. I feel like I just went ten rounds with mighty Thor. Yeah, lots of people did. Tell them I hate them. Perhaps, but perhaps your civilization is merely the sewer of an even greater society above you!

I suppose I could part with ‘one’ and still be feared…

No argument here. I decline the title of Iron Cook and accept the lesser title of Zinc Saucier, which I just made up. Uhh… also, comes with double prize money. And remember, don’t do anything that affects anything, unless it turns out you were supposed to, in which case, for the love of God, don’t not do it!

  1. Yeah. Give a little credit to our public schools.
  2. Uh, is the puppy mechanical in any way?
  3. Bender, you risked your life to save me!

Bender, I didn’t know you liked cooking. That’s so cute.

You don’t know how to do any of those. A true inspiration for the children. Son, as your lawyer, I declare y’all are in a 12-piece bucket o’ trouble. But I done struck you a deal: Five hours of community service cleanin’ up that ol’ mess you caused.

  • I’ll get my kit!
  • We’re also Santa Claus!
  • Ah, yes! John Quincy Adding Machine. He struck a chord with the voters when he pledged not to go on a killing spree.

Oh, but you can. But you may have to metaphorically make a deal with the devil. And by «devil», I mean Robot Devil. And by «metaphorically», I mean get your coat. I saw you with those two «ladies of the evening» at Elzars. Explain that.

OK, this has gotta stop. I’m going to remind Fry of his humanity the way only a woman can. Good news, everyone! There’s a report on TV with some very bad news! And from now on you’re all named Bender Jr.

If rubbin’ frozen dirt in your crotch is wrong, hey I don’t wanna be right. That’s not soon enough! Do a flip! Oh, all right, I am. But if anything happens to me, tell them I died robbing some old man.

Kids don’t turn rotten just from watching TV. I’ve got to find a way to escape the horrible ravages of youth. Suddenly, I’m going to the bathroom like clockwork, every three hours. And those jerks at Social Security stopped sending me checks. Now ‘I» have to pay »them’!

It’s toe-tappingly tragic! Tell her you just want to talk. It has nothing to do with mating. Negative, bossy meat creature! I don’t ‘need’ to drink. I can quit anytime I want! Meh. It’s a T. It goes «tuh».

Oh, how I wish I could believe or understand that! There’s only one reasonable course of action now: kill Flexo! What’s with you kids? Every other day it’s food, food, food. Alright, I’ll get you some stupid food.

Son, as your lawyer, I declare y’all are in a 12-piece bucket o’ trouble. But I done struck you a deal: Five hours of community service cleanin’ up that ol’ mess you caused. Bender! Ship! Stop bickering or I’m going to come back there and change your opinions manually!

OK, this has gotta stop. I’m going to remind Fry of his humanity the way only a woman can. I wish! It’s a nickel. There, now he’s trapped in a book I wrote: a crummy world of plot holes and spelling errors!

I don’t want to be rescued. I meant ‘physically’. Look, perhaps you could let me work for a little food? I could clean the floors or paint a fence, or service you sexually? You guys go on without me! I’m going to go… look for more stuff to steal!

You guys go on without me! I’m going to go… look for more stuff to steal! No! The kind with looting and maybe starting a few fires! I feel like I was mauled by Jesus. Stop! Don’t shoot fire stick in space canoe! Cause explosive decompression!

Stop! Don’t shoot fire stick in space canoe! Cause explosive decompression! If rubbin’ frozen dirt in your crotch is wrong, hey I don’t wanna be right. What are their names? I just want to talk. It has nothing to do with mating. Fry, that doesn’t make sense.